


WAIFU Megacorp

by BananaHamokHank



Category: Lucky Star (Anime & Manga), Naruto, RWBY, Shantae (Video Games)
Genre: Breastfeeding, Clit/Hood Piercing, Clothed Sex, Excessive Cum -- Light, F/M, Inverted Nipples, Lactation, Masturbation, Multi, Nipple Piercings, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-16 13:55:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29577159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananaHamokHank/pseuds/BananaHamokHank
Summary: WAIFU, short for Waterfall Association of Information, Function, and Utility, a megacorp staffed by a plethora of Waifus from assorted series and settings!To be completely honest, this is just an excuse to write about some of my favorite female characters getting dicked in an office setting. Characters will be some degree of out of character for the sake of the setting.
Relationships: Konata x Anon, Neopolitan x Anon, Shantae x Anon, Tsunade and Konata x Anon
Kudos: 6





	1. Neo Politan and Shantae

Really, I wasn't entirely sure why I was here. I got a message from Miss Politan that she needed help with her computer. Under any normal circumstance, I would've just told her to turn it off and turn it back on or make sure it was plugged or whatever. Generally, the problem was that simple but she insisted it was something else and couldn't quite explain what the problem was because computers. And so, after traversing something like 20 floors from the basement where IT was to her office, I was now sat behind her computer, trying to figure out what exactly the problem was while she hovered over my shoulder with that smug gremlin smirk on her lips.

"So, what exactly is the problem?" I asked while looking back at her with a raised eyebrow.

Neo tapped her chin for a moment before pulling her text-to-speech device and quickly tapping into it. Her typing gave me at least enough time to look her over. She was dressed in a sleeveless white button-up blouse with a blue-ish green ascot, a just barely short enough black skirt, and sheer thigh high stockings. It honestly took some concentration to not start tenting at her appearance. Didn't help she was showing 2, maybe 3, buttons worth of cleavage.

My attention pulled away from examining her when she stopped typing on her phone and pushed up her glasses. <Lemme show you!> The TTS said, causing me to deadpan. Really? All of that typing for just that?

I let out a sigh and started pushing back the chair, however, she was quicker. Neo stepped around with almost a twirl and plopped herself down on my lap, that... juicy ass oh so perfectly positioned. Her head barely reaching my chin. Yeah, it was taking a lotta concentration.

Anyways, I watched as she began to click through windows, opening and closing windows at almost random it seemed. She seemed to be trying to prolong this for as long as possible. She eventually opened up her email and clicked on one with an attachment. "Ah, I see. Must've been a virus from that attachment," I mused out loud.

Suddenly... she opened it.

My eyes went wide first as the video began to play, then my jaw dropped. It was... Miss Shantae, Head Office Admin. The young woman was tilted back in her chair, the windows to her office covered, and her lamp shining right at her while the overhead light was off. One leg was hiked up onto the arm over her chair, Her purple hair done up in a bun and slightly disheveled, her black skirt bunched up at her waist, and her red blouse pulled open, her purple bra unclasped to reveal her surprisingly large breasts. Each leg was clad in a sheer dark stocking with garter straps.

"Anon," Shantae moaned, something that caused my eyes to go even wider. She had her left hand working her breast, the tips of her fingers working the nipple. His eyes were drawn to the golden rings that topped each of her dark nipples. Then my eyes shifted down. Her other hand wasn't idle either. It vigorously worked a large gold colored dildo in and out of her already dripping cunt. While she masturbated, she was moaning for the camera, her eyes locked with mine.

Then, something moving against my crotch caused me to groan as well. I looked down at the small woman on my lap, noting the way she looked up at me with that devilish smirk. Her hips switched back and forth as I practically hotdogged her.

<Enjoying the sight?> She asked while leaning back against me to force me to relax into the chair.

"Ye-yeah," I groaned out, my hands grasping each arm of the chair, practically white knuckling right now.

Neo giggled, speeding up the rhythm of her ass in time with Shantae's own movements. <I bet you wanna be the dildo. Fucking her daylights out.>

"Yeah."

<Hmhmhm, naughty boy. Thinking about such lewd things. And you're so hard too. Like you're about to nut all over the inside of your pants.>

My teeth grit as I concentrated as hard as I could. She was right, I was about to nut. It'd been a while since the last time I came since work had been so busy and the way Neo was moving her ass was just way too much.

<Oh!> I perked up at that. <Here's my favorite part!> I watched the screen intently.

Tae's hand moved from her breast to her mouth as her moans began to change into cries. It only took a few more minutes, if that, but it felt like an eternity before we both finally came. A muffled scream came from Shantae as I let out a loud groan. By the end, we were both left panting.

"I-I hoped... you enjoyed the show, Anon, and... would like an in person demonstration," Shantae said, smiling before leaning forward and hitting the button to end the recording.

I sat there, panting and getting everything under control. The front of my pants were utterly soaked with jizz. A low groan came out as Neo got off my lap. She ran a finger over the crotch of my pants, collecting some semen that had seeped through before placing it in her mouth.

<Delicious!> The TTS said while she shivered a bit, giving me a smirk after a moment. <Well? Wanna pound that genie pussy?>

For a few moments, my eyes closed while thinking it over. Well, less thinking it over and more trying to fully comprehend what just happened. They reopened as I smirked at Neo. "Yeah."

A giggle came out of Neo, now sitting on the edge of her desk. She reached over and tapped on her phone for a moment before it began to ring.

"Yes, Miss Neo?" Shantae's voice came through.

<Yes, Shantae, can you please come over to my office? There's someone here waiting that has a *very big present* for you.>

I swear I could hear Shantae squee on the other line, though she did give a small correcting cough. "Yes, ma'am. I'll be over ASAP." With that, the brief call ended. 

\----

  
Thankfully, Neo found it in her heart to get me a fresh pair of underwear and pants after making me turn my pants white and sticky. For some reason, she insisted I go change in the bathroom. <I want it to be as much of a surprise for me as it is for Shantae!> She told me. An odd reason, though I guess it's understandable. After returning, she sat on my lap and teased me some more, playing parts of the video again and again to gauge my reaction. Never did hotdog me again though.

After a bit longer, Shantae finally made it, giving the door a knock before pushing it open a bit. "Neo?"

<Come in, Shantae, dear!>

The half-genie admin came in the rest of the way, making sure to close the door and lock it too. She looked far more orderly than in the video with her gold half framed glasses and the black choker around her neck. Meanwhile, Neo hopped off my lap before pushing the chair around to the front of the desk so I was now sat in front of Shantae.

"How are you doing, Anon?" She asked with a soft smile.

"Fine, kinda wish Neo didn't make me ruin my pants," I said while shooting a knowing smile at the shortstack, who just giggled. She was quick to move beside Shantae and showed her something that caused her to gasp. No doubt it was the picture she took after hanging up.

"He came that much?"

<Yep!>

"W-wow!"

Neo just giggled before turning and pointing at me. <Alright, Anon, drop trou and show us the slab of tasty manmeat you've been hiding in there!>

In return, I just chuckled and shrugged. "Alright alright, fine. Just a moment, you gremlin," I replied as I stood. Undoing my belt and then my pants, they dropped with my underwear. The expressions of the two women froze in shock, their eyes wide as their jaws dropped open a small amount at the sight before them. Neo was the first to react as she quickly ran around to her desk and got out a measuring tape before returning back to me. First she measured length then girth, writing both down on a notepad on hand. I watched with a raised eyebrow as she bit her bottom lip for a moment. She then lifted my cock and slooooowly ran her tongue from hilt to head, drawing a long groan from me.

Shantae was quick to join her, though they first nudged back into the seat first before they got to work. Neo went low, beginning to suckle and lick at my balls. Whichever testicle wasn't getting the mouth treatment was getting the hand treatment. Her fingers moved carefully and precise, groping and massaging the other. Meanwhile, her partner in crime was focused on my dick. She pulled open her blouse to expose those big tits once again, wrapping them around the base. Whatever was left she got to work licking and paying lavish attention to. I groaned out happily at their dual attention resting one hand on the back of Shantae's head as her lips wrapped around my cockhead and she began to suck furiously. "Holy shit, this feels fantastic," I groaned out happily.

<Konata said you were packing heat, but didn't mention this much.> Neo said, drawing out a chuckle from me. Of course that blunette mentioned it. She was normally pretty tight lipped, but I guess she must've told them after the other day.

Turning my attention back to two currently servicing me, I grabbed the back of Shantae's head as she looked up at her. Hearts had basically replaced her pupils. Smiling back at her, I suddenly shoved her down as deep as she could take me, which was thankfully, to the root as her breasts moved out of the way. She gagged and gasped at the feeling of her throat being stretched so much. Her choker strained around the bulge that was created and after a few moments, it snapped. Pulling her head back up, I smirked at Tae as she was able to get a couple breaths in before she practically forced herself back down to my surprise.

~glchk~ ~glchk~ ~glchk~ 

The wet sloppy sound of her deepthroating me was soon joined by the sound of my groans. She pushed all the way down quickly and then sucked all the way back up. The hand on the back of her head only served to guide her up and down the length.

~glchk~ ~glchk~ ~glchk~

Thick strands of saliva coated my dick every time she went down and eventually, Neo had to squirm her way out from under us both, shaking her head as spittle had dropped on top of her.

<Well, I wasn't expect this from Shantae.> She giggled, leaning against her desk while watching the sight. Lifting the hem of her skirt, Neo began to rub at her own pussy, biting her bottom lip while watching.

~glchk~ ~glchk~ ~glchk~

"Oh gods, oh fuck!" I groaned out in pleasure, grabbing the back of Shantae's head with both hands.

~glchk~ ~glchk~ ~glchk~

One of my eyes twitched as I grit my teeth, trying to hold on for dear life as she gave me the deepthroating of a lifetime. It didn't take too much longer for my second peak of the day. I let out a loud groan and held Shantae's head to the base of my dick. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as I poured my load down her throat. At the same time, Neo let out a cry, just outside of my vision though it was obvious she came from the sight of me cumming from the facefucking. After a bit, I sat back with a contented sigh while releasing the dark-skinned woman between my legs.

Slowly, she pulled off, sucking the entire way as she did so. Shantae released my dick with a sloppy pop, sitting back herself and panting heavily. Looking down at her, she was quite the beautiful mess to behold. Her mascara was running down her face and her lipstick smeared along my dick. Thick lines of spittle down her chin, mixed with my seed, and dripping on to her breasts. Speaking of those heavenly mounds, they jiggled ever so slightly with every heavy breath she made.

"That... was fantastic," I managed to grunt as I sat up, looking around for a brief moment for something so Shantae could wipe herself off a bit.

"Mmmmm, yes, I've... never had someone be so aggressive before," She said with a wide smile as she stood up. Reaching back, she undid her bun and swung her head back and forth to allow her hair to floof.

<Heh, knew you two would make for an interesting show,> Neo giggled, pushing off her desk before grabbing Shantae's hand. <Let's get you cleaned up before the main course.>

"Wait, you had your own bathroom?" I asked incredulously, deadpanning at the sight of her opening a side door I'd just noticed.

<Yes, why wouldn't I?>

"You never told me!"

<You never asked.> Neo stuck her tongue out at me before walking into the bathroom behind Shantae.

With a roll of my eyes, I stood up and stretched for a brief moment. Thankfully, it didn't take too long for the girls to return. Shantae's messed up makeup had been cleaned off and the spittle that had coated her breasts wiped off. "Thanks for waiting," Shantae cooed as she approached me. She then kissed me, her hand going to my dick and slowly stroking it.

<Alright, you love birds, time for the main course,> Neo said. Looking over at the shortstack, I blinked in surprise. In that brief time span we were making out, Neo had cleared over her desk and was now sitting off to one side. She gave us that same devilish smirk she always had and patted the area next to her. With a giggle, Shantae gave me one more kiss before walking over to the desk with a heavy sway to her hips. She bent over, her skirt lifting over her phat ass as she spread her legs. Something I just noticed was the bar piercing in her clitoral hood and oh boy did that get the engine revving.

As I approached, Neo grabbed her partner's ass, spreading the cheeks, and as I got right up behind Shantae, she grabbed my dick and slowly guided me in. That little cum gremlin smirked up at again, purposefully teasing us both by forcing my cock to rub against 'tae's lower lips without allowing me to fully penetrate.

"N-neo!" Shantae moaned. "Just let him fuck me already!" She yelped as Neo slapped her ass. With an overly exaggerated sigh, Neo released me to fuck the half-genie to my hearts content.

And thusly I did.

I grabbed Shantae's hips with both hands and with a loud grunt, I thrust into her. A loud squeal tore from her, hot juices squirting out as I slammed into her cervix at full force and she came hard. No time was wasted as I began to thrust like a mad man, driving into her with all the force I could muster.

~PLAP~ ~PLAP~ ~PLAP~

"Oh gods!" She screamed out from the thorough fucking I was giving her. Every thrust and hard piston of my hips drew a moan, cry, or squeal of such exquisite pleasure. Her body quaked from the force, that big ass jiggling from the impacts. Speaking of which, my hands moved to her ass, squeezing and groping at it, giving it an occasional firm slap that drew another squeal from her.

Neo could only grin while she watched us fucking like rabbits. Sitting back, she pushed aside her own thong and began to rub at her clit at the sight.

As a particularly powerful thrust hit Shantae's g-spot, her entire body spasmed for a quick moment as she came hard. Her eyes rolled back and her tongue fell out of her gaping mouth. "Right there!" She screamed.

~PLAP~ ~PLAP~ ~PLAP~

I grinned down at her, giving her ass one more smack before I began to focus hard on that particularly sensitive spot. Short, rapid fire thrusts that jackhammered the hell out of it, sending waves of pleasure surging through her body.

"Yes! YES!" She moaned. "Your cock is the best! I just can't get enough of it!" Orgasm after orgasm rolled over her as drooled onto the desk, eyes rolled back.

~PLAP~ ~PLAP~ ~PLAP~

I couldn't help but groan myself. Her pussy felt fantastic. Every time I would pull back, she gripped at my dick with all she could like her body was afraid I was just going to leave her, and it welcomed me rightly as I drove back in. I grit my teeth, thrusting with all I could. Hearing a scream from Neo, I looked over and watched as she orgasmed as well, clearly pleased with her show.

"AHHHHHNHHH!"  
"GUHHHHHHHH!"  
"AAAAAHHHHH!"  
"HRRRRHHHNN!"  
"NGHAAAAAAH!"

Every moan and squeal that came out of Shantae just spurned me on to keep going.

~PLAP~ ~PLAP~ ~PLAP~

Eventually, I had her on her back, one leg on my shoulder with my arm wrapped around her thick thigh. Neo had taken up the duty of not leaving Shantae's breasts to just bounce wildly with our mating. She had one hand on one tit while her mouth was wrapped around the other nipple, sucking and flicking the pierced nub.

I was getting to the end of what exactly I could handle. Two nuts back to back and I was just a bit sensitive. Normally, I'd try to last longer, but, well. The pussy was just too good.

After just a bit longer, I gave a final thrust into Shantae, spearing right through her cervix as I did so while releasing her leg. Her eyes went wide, letting out an almost voiceless cry of pleasure while her legs wrapped and locked around my waist. With a groan of my own, I pumped stream after stream of thick fertile semen into her. Neo sat back and watched with the umpteenth stunned expression she made in the last however long as her friend's toned stomach bloated by a good amount with the sheer amount. When Shantae's womb couldn't take any more, the rest poured out from around my cock and over her round buttocks, dripping onto the floor.

After a few moments more, I was finally done. Slowly, I pulled out of her and flopped my half hard cock onto belly.

<I don't know whether I'm the same level of impressed or more impressed by the showing,> Neo said with a giggle. Smirking, I watched as she leaned down and kissed the head of my cock. For a brief moment, she sucked on just the very tip, drawing out a small amount of pre- and cum with a groan from me.

"Mmmm, I bet you want a round now?" I asked to which Neo responded with a shake of her head.

<Nope. Gonna wait for just a bit. R&D is cooking up something interesting, so if that pans out, I'll give you a call. I'll get her going her cleaned up, so you get back to doing whatever it is that you do.>

I rolled my eyes while pulling up my underwear and pants, stuffing myself back in and getting everything buckled and clasped back up.

As I turned to leave, Neo quickly said, <Hold on, Romeo!> I turned back to them, watched with a raised eyebrow as Neo skipped over to me and showed me... Shantae's lacy thong. <A reward for a job well done.> She winked at me before stuffing them in my breast pocket. <Now git!> With a slap to my ass, she then went back over to the barely coherent Office Admin.

I only responded with a hearty chuckle as I left Neo's office. Konata was going to get a kick out of this.


	2. The Next Chapter

"Ahhhhnnn~! Nii-chan~!"

"Stop."

"Onii-chan~! Right there! It makes me feel so good~!"

"Kona, stop that. It's weird."

"Come on, you siscon, you know you like it," Konata snickered before moaning loudly. The shortstack blunette Konata Izumi was my coworker and effective best friend and right now, we were sitting in what was effectively our office and apartment deep in the bowels of the main building on the WAIFU campus. A lotta employees lived and worked on the campus for WAIFU Industries since it didn't help that it was kinda the size of a small town. Some of the bigwigs did tend to live off res though.

At the moment, Konata was sitting on my lap on our couch while we were both watching the video of Shantae masturbating on the TV. I was knuckles deep in her pussy with one hand while she was stroking me off with both hands and half grinding into the rest. At the moment I was dressed... well, in my pants and boxers, though they were around my knees. Konata was only wearing a tanktop, having shed her shorts some time ago.

"I ain't a siscon, you brocon," I retorted with a groan of my own, my fingers pulling out of her to start rubbing at her clit and that ring piercing she had.

"Ah fuck, no joke, right there." Both of our paces quickened with our approaching orgasms. As precum bubbled forth in greater quantity, she slapped my hand a few times. "Hey! Hey! Hold on, let me swallow it. It's gonna take forever to clean up if you just cum everywhere, Anon."

"Yeah yeah." Pulling my fingers away, she scooted off my lap and laid down with her head now there. As she kissed and licked at my cock head, my hand found its way back between her legs. She gave a deep breath and dove down, forcing out a long groan from me as she went all the way down. Sucking firmly, her head bobbed up and down while one of her hands began to massage my balls.

Thankfully for her, neither of us lasted much longer. She let out a muffled moan as her hot juices squirted across my fingers . My own hit shortly after as my free hand grabbed the back of her head and forced her to the root and kept her there. As I groaned loudly, I dumped a thick load of jizz down her throat. She was doing her best to swallow what she could, her toned stomach bloating a good measure from the amount. What she couldn't swallow came back up, some splattering against my lap but mostly coating her face in cum and saliva.

Once I was spent, I released her head and Konata pulled off, the last few spurts splattering against her face. She rolled over onto her back, her cheeks bulging and as she faced up at me, she opened her mouth to reveal the large amount of cum there. "Holy fuck, that's hot," I said before she grinned and closed her mouth, swallowing the load.

"Tasty," She chuckled before jumping up and stretching. "Alright, I'm gonna go take a shower. You check the messages and make sure the compound isn't on fire."

"Ah, come on! I checked the messages last time!" I faux-whined while wiping myself off and then pulling up my pants, watching as she strutted away.

"Yeah, well, you don't have cum all over your face," She retorted, sticking out her tongue at me before disappearing into the bathroom.

“Yeah yeah,” I said with a dismissive wave off my hand.

Moving over to my desk, I began to flick through the messages that we had. Thanks to the modern miracle of technology, we’d set up a few bots to handle our job for us, mostly because most of the complaints were easy enough solves that they could be handled with a few prompts. This generally freed us up to nap, watch movies, game, fuck, basically anything that wasn’t our job. There were a few that slipped through the cracks or needed in person help, the kind of problems that were genuine and not Lucoa having no idea how computers work. Or Aqua, but she generally bothered Kazuma.

Either way, I gathered up whatever issues there were left over, shuffled off those that had genuine problems and called up the couple that could be handled over the phone. Konata soon returned in all her butt naked glory. While she wasn’t at all top heavy, she certainly had the bottom half that was to die for, and she put it to good use to distract me while I was on the phone. Half sitting on my desk, she had one leg hiked up while her fingers tenderly stroked at her clit, ensuring to apply pressure to that silvery piercing. Her other hand was playing with one of her nipples, gently flicking and rubbing at the barbell heart piercing she had. If I didn’t know any better, the little tease was trying to make me fuck her while I was working.

And it was kinda working, though I wouldn’t give into the temptation. I am a man of iron will!

Once all the calls were done, I took off my headset and finally let out a breath, now sporting one hell of a tent. “Well, shit, man. What is that? Two for two?” She said, finally stopping her teasing show and hopping off my desk.

“Yep, I’m gonna need one hell of a cold shower after that,” I said roughly while I stood.

“Awwww, you don’t wanna dump a fat load of jizz in my pussy?” Now bent over my desk, she wiggled her ass at me, looking back with an innocent expression.

I just deadpanned at her before giving that all too well toned ass a firm slap.

“Ahhhhn~! Onii-chan!”

“Hai, onii-chan desu,” I said, slapping her other ass cheek with the back of my hand.

“You’re so rough, Onii-chan!” She moaned as I continued to ‘punish’ her with firm slaps to her ass. I couldn’t help but admire the way her flesh rippled and jiggled with each smack, a deepening red mark being left on either cheek. Her faux-moans soon turned into real ones and she took to gently biting her knuckle to keep them from coming out too clearly.

“Such a naughty girl, KonaKona.” My voice coming out in a low growl. I leaned over her, gently rubbing her right ass cheek on the spot I’ve been spanking. “To think my cute co-worker would be such a maso-bitch?”

“Staaaaahp!” She said, moaning at the feeling before letting out a yelp as I spanked her again. As I began to pull away, she glared back at me. “Don’t actually stop, ya Doofu-EEEP!” My hand came down hard on her ass one again.

She cried or moaned out with every spank I gave her, stopping every few to let her breath and to rub the punished spots. This wasn’t the first time I had to punish her like this and she could take a surprising amount of it.

After a bit and quite suddenly, my work phone rang and caused both of us to freeze, staring at it. It was… exceedingly rare for the phone to just ring. One of the bots generally caught it and handled any problems, so whoever it was knew how to just get right through them. Picking it up, I said, “Hello?” with a decidedly confused tone.

“Is this Mister Anon of the IT Division?” Division was pushing it, but never mind.

“Uh, yes, this is him?” Konata’s finger hovering over the call cutoff, waiting for my signal to kill the line just incase it was some inane telecom operator.

“This is Doctor Tsunade Senjuu with Onsite Medical. Is Miss Izumi there with you?” I let out a sigh of relief. Given the size of WAIFU Industries, Onsite Medical was almost entirely necessary. It also allowed for keeping some of the… shadier practices done around campus.

“Yeah, hold on, let me put you on speaker phone.” With a nod to the blunette, she hit the speaker button.

“Hi, this is Konata speaking!” She said, switching over to her customer service personality remarkably easy despite the fact she had been panting just moments before.

“Hello, Miss Izumi. I calling to inform you both that your yearly mandatory medical exams are overdue to be done.”

“Oh, shit, yeah! Totally forgot about that!” Konata said with a bit of a chuckle. More like neither of us wanted to go. “When do you want us to come by?”

“Well, if you don’t have any work at the moment, why don’t you both come to my office right now?”

We both looked at the list of in-person IT contacts we needed to do. “Yeah, we’re free. We’ll be there in a bit,” I said.

“Splendid,” Tsunade replied before adding. “Oh, and if you two aren’t here within the hour, I’ll send SecDiv to drag you here. Bye!” Before either of us could stammer out a response, she hung up.

We looked at each other, then at the clock, and finally scrambled to get dressed. Thankfully, we didn’t have any important in-person visits we needed to do, especially that one that was flashing red from Aqua.

\---

“What did you do this time, you useless Goddess?!” Kazuma yelled as he dodged a tentacle swung at him.

“Noooooooooooooothiiiiiiiiiiiiing!” Aqua whined, hiding behind a desk. As most anyone could surmise, Aqua did do something. Something only an Aqua could do. Somehow, someway, thanks to opening some kind of attachment to a junk email she received, she summoned a giant tentacle monster. “Kazumaaaaaaaaa!” She then screamed as a tentacle found her and yanked her out of the relative safety of the desk.

“Son of a bitch!” Kazuma growled, slashing at tentacles and using various skills to avoid getting grabbed by the monster.

“Turn Greater Undead!” Aqua said, casting the spell on the not-undead creature. “Kazuma! It didn’t work!” She yelled, swatting at tentacles that began to tug and tear at her clothing.

“Yeah, no shit!”

A yelp came from the very useless goddess as one of the tentacles began to worm its way up the inside of her thigh. “Kazuma! Hurry! It’s trying to do h-things to me!”

“Damn you, Aqua!” Said Kazuma yelled as he lunged at the beast.

\---

“You’re both comfortable doing this together?” Tsunade asked while sitting back in her office chair, her right leg crossed over the other. The doctor was dressed in a regular lab/medical coat with a black mini-dress that revealed plenty of cleavage from her honestly huge breasts and the lower hem ended maybe a bit too far up her thigh. Neither of us minded, though as we sat on the medical bed, I had to shift a bit to stop from popping a boner. I certainly didn’t help she was wearing sheer black thigh-high stockings and a black choker. Fucking hell, what is it with the women around here wearing leggings or stockings so much. Well, not Konata since was currently wearing a loose fitting blue and white shirt with the Lucky Stars logo on the front of it and in total opposite of that, the tightest fitting pair of jeans she could possibly squeeze her phat ass into. No doubt revenge for the spanking session I put her through since she kept pace in front of me the entire way here.

“Yeah, makes sense since you called us up here together,” I replied, giving a shrug.

“Yep! Certainly doesn’t help that we do just about everything together anyways,” Konata said with a nod.

“Right, well, let’s begin,” Tsunade said while lifting her clipboard. Over the next several minutes came the series of questions and tests that generally came with the medical exams. Nothing neither of us hadn’t done before, so there was no real point to recount all of it.

Well, that is until….

“Are either of you sexually active?” Tsunade asked with the expression one had when they knew the answer that was going to come but still officially had to ask.

“Yes,” we both answered with gusto.

“And how often do you engage in sex?”

“Like, with each other or just in general?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Surprise me,” She said, an expression of genuine curiosity coming to her face. It was an open secret we were fucking, having been caught at least a couple times both in our office and in places that weren’t our office.

“Hmmmm, well, *we* probably fuck, what,” Konata began and looked up at me with a raised eyebrow. “Five, six times daily? Basically whenever either of us get horny.” An answer that quickly changed up Tsunade’s look to a bit of surprise.

“Guess who that usually is,” I added with a not so secret sideline with my thumb at Konata, who promptly elbowed me in the side.

“Hey, who’s the one that woke me up today by grinding his fuckhuge cock against me?”

“Says you. You woke me up yesterday by sucking my dick.”

“Hey, I was horny and needed it!”

“See what I mean?” I said while looking to Tsunade.

The woman was stunned for just a moment before letting out a clearing cough and saying, “Quite,” while writing something down. “Do you two have sex with just one another or are others involved?”

“There’s others involved,” We both said.

“He fucked Shantae in Admin the other day while Neo watched,” Konata said, nodding towards me.

“Not just watched. She was actually involved, though we didn’t actually fuck.”

“Yeah yeah. Anyways, about… a week ago, I fucked Calli in Admin.”

“Ooof, yeah, I remember that. Damn, still can’t believe you fucked her.”

It went on like this for a bit longer, recounting a number of people both banged over the last while. While we both knew who the other banged since we shared it all the time, it was nice to talk about it. As it came to an end, we glanced over at Tsunade, noting that her legs had become uncrossed and were now pressed tightly together. Her face and chest were notably flushed red and she seemed quite distracted.

“So, Doc, when was the last time you fucked?” Konata asked with that same smug little gremlin grin she had whenever she concocted some kind of plan, and it was more than likely the same as myself.

The Doctor twitched for a moment, suddenly brought back to the real world as she blinked in surprise. “Huh?”

“Yeah, when was the last time you fucked? We shared all of our recent bangs, might as well share yours!” I added while leaning back.

She stared at us both for a moment before sighing and looking away. “It’s… probably been about a year since I last had sex with anything other than my hand or a toy,” She said. “Maybe longer since I was actually satisfied with it.”

“Well, how about we help end your dry streak?”

“Yeah, and it’s probably a bit unhealthy to go that long with a good proper smashing!”

Her attention turned back to us, raising an eyebrow in disbelief at how this whole appointment had changed so drastically. “It’d be rather unprofessional of me to fuck not only one, but two of my patients,” She said, her tone belying it was nothing more than a weak excuse.

“We promise we won’t tell a soul before you do,” I said in return as we both made an X over our chests.

For a few moments, she was silent, gently stroking her chin as she thought it over. We had thought we had made a mistake propositioning her like that and in a sane world, it probably was. However, she eventually let out a soft sigh before standing and shedding her lab coat. “I suppose you are both correct, however weak your arguments are,” She said. “Miss Iz-- Konata, please lock the door so we aren’t bothered. Even if your talltales are somewhat true, this will most likely take a while.”

“Hardly talltales, Tsunade,” I said, standing with Konata. As she went over to the door, I walked over to the older woman. “A little fibbing here and there, but everything we said was as close to the truth as possible.”

“Hm, I’ll be the judge of that.” With that, I cupped her cheek and closed the distance between us, locking lips with her. A soft coo came out of her, her arms loosely wrapping around my neck while the kiss deepened. Our tongues battling for these brief moments for some kind of control. While my hands were resting on her waist, one wandered up the curve of her body and reached one of those massive tits. She moaned into the kiss as I began to eagerly grope at the heavy mound, squeezing and massaging it with strong squeezes.

“Hmhmhm, enjoying yourselves without me?” Konata teased as she returned. I just did my best to wink at her while she retorted with a roll of her eyes.

After a couple more minutes, I pulled back, a long strand of saliva connecting my lips with Tsunade’s while she was left panting and beet red from the experience. “It’s… been a while since I was last kissed like that.”

“How about since you last eaten out?” Konata had managed to squeeze herself between us and was now resting her chin on the tops of Tsunade’s colossal tits.

“Take a wild guess,” She retorted with a bit of a smirk. “A bit longer admittedly. The last time was a former colleague of mine.”

We both nodded before Konata grinned. “Well, it’s your lucky day! I find it’s a good way of getting a woman warmed up for my big guy.” With that she dropped down to the floor and sneaked in between Tsunade’s heavenly thighs.

A soft chuckle came from the woman before her thong went flying past behind me. “I bet.” Her attention then turned to me as I got closer again, my hand finding its way back to her breast. Soon, we had her moaning and quivering. Konata had quite the skilled little tongue, switching her focus from the labia itself, to the interior, to the clit; eagerly lapping at the quickly dripping cunt. I quickly pulled open our partner’s dress, exposing her breasts completely. After a quick remark that earned a chuckle, I began to eagerly grope them both. Well, really, I had one hand focusing the groping one tit as best as I could. My fingers sank into the soft, supple flesh as they caressed it. The other was focusing on the other nipple, smirking at their inverted nipple. Once it was erect, she seemed to really enjoy the attention paid to it.

“Mmmm, ahn! Ghhhhh! Fuck, this feels good!” Tsunade moaned out, shivering and quaking thanks to our careful attention.

“As it should,” I said while switching which hand was doing.

“Oh! Fffffffuuu! Right there, Konata!” It seemed my little partner found an interesting spot. “I-I gotta - oh! -- gotta ask… oh gods!... Are you two in -- Grh! -- a relationship?”

We both paused for a brief moment at the question before returning to our diligent work. “No, not really. While we’re very close and we fuck like rabbits, we’re not in any official relationship. No sense in putting anything unnecessary.”

“Mmm, good chhhhhhhhOOOOOOH!” Tsunade moaned out loudly, grabbed the back of Konata’s head and held her to her crotch as she came hard. Honestly, it happened quicker than I was expecting. After a couple of moments, she came down panting heavily, though quickly catching her breath as she relaxed.

“Quick to cum and quick to recover, I likey!” Konata said with a giggle as she stood up.

“Hm, yes,” Tsunade said while letting out a sigh, giving her head a shake. Her attention then turned to me. “Well, I think it’s time for you to impress now, Anon.”

“Is that so?” I asked. The woman just gave a nod while walking over to the exam bed and sat down on the edge. “Alright then.” I just chuckled as I walked over and stood in front of her, smirking as I began to unbuckle and unzip things. She was staring intently at the heavy bulge I was now sporting after everything, not even noticing as Konata plopped down next her, both now watching with lustful intent. My pants and boxers slowly dropped, revealing just a bit before dropping entirely. Tsunade gasped as my cock sprang up, the cockhead right there in front of her face and nearly making her go cross eyed briefly just to look at the behemoth properly.

“Oh gods,” She said quietly, practically drooling at the sight, a shiver running down her spine.

“Pretty big, eh?” Konata cooed in her ear.

“Y-yeah.”

“Of course it is. Hits my womb every time we fuck. It hurts a bit, but the pleasure I feel… mmmmm, fantastic. Better than beating Halo 1 LASO without taking any damage.” Tsunade’s brow furrowed at the reference but she nodded in understanding. Slowly, she laid back, her dress bunched up around her midsection. Her stocking clad legs spread while she gave me a sultry smile with half lidded eyes. Konata reached down and spread her lower lips between her fingers while grinning at me. “Well, nii-chan? Fuck her daylights out!”

They didn’t need to tell me twice!

Slipping an arm under each leg, I got myself aligned before thrusting forward with a grunt. Tsunade gasped, her eyes going wide and just briefly rolling back at the feeling of being stretched so much. Konata just giggled at her reaction before leaning down to start sucking on one of her nipples.

The woman was soon a moaning, quivering mess. My powerful thrusts drove deep into her, slamming right up against her cervix every time and getting a hitched squeal from her every time. Something the ballpark of “Heee!” every time it happened. My heavy balls slapped against her ass with every thrust, ensuring the various groans and grunts weren’t the only debaucherous sounds being made. I could only smirk, watch as she writhed and squirmed thanks to our brief efforts so far. She was being surprisingly unquiet to the pleasure flowing through her, letting out screams, squeals, moans, and cries of pleasure.

“Oh gods, oh fuck!” She cried out, back arching and contorting. Her tongue forced out with wide eyes while she squirted hard from the first non-self given orgasm she’d had in… ages. Her feminine juices coated my lap, dripped over my swaying balls and onto the bed. But she was quick to recover, soon right back to moaning so lewdly.

“No kidding, she is quick on both fronts,” I said with a chuckle, lifting her right leg up so it was resting more against my torso while her other leg hooked more around my waist.

“Oh, she definitely is,” Kona giggled. She shifted around and soon wrapped both arms around Tsunade’s breasts, flexing and squeezing them to get more of a reaction from her. “So, what do you think did her in? I’m thinking me sucking these big milkers.”

“Ahhhhhnnnn!”

“Nah, getting some good dick did it. Happens all the time,” I retorted, grunting as I shifted my stancing. This caused a differing angle of penetration that I was sure would get something.

“Mmmmrrrrhhhhnnn!”

“Oh please!” Konata scoffed, reaching down to pat the rapidly shifting bulge Tsunade had. “You might have a big dick, but nothing beats messing with bigger tits.” She giggled, hugging her breasts again. Her mouth soon latched onto both nipples at once and began sucking hard.

“Guuuuuuhhhhh!”

I just chuckled and shook my head. With nothing much better to do with my other hand thanks to that leg behind wrapped partially around my waist, it moved Tsunade’s clit. She let out a louder moan, cumming again as I rubbed it in small tight circles.

“Okay, that time was you, jackass,” Konata said, her voice muffled by the nipples in her mouth. “Mmm!” She suddenly moaned.

“What’s up?” I asked, watching with a raised eyebrow as she sucked with greater intent.

After a couple moments of that and a few more orgasms from our new fuckbuddy, Kona released the nipples from her suck with a “Pwwwah!”, causing a small spray of breast milk to splash against her face. While Tsunade was panting heavily, her massive heaving tits were lactating quite heavily.

“Holy shit, no way!” I leaned forward with a wide grin, pausing only briefly to inspect the mounds before returning to fucking her.

“I know right! Didn’t think they’d actually be milkers!” Konata said, giggle while shifting a bit to the side.

“Fuck, I need to get a taste. Never thought I would be able to actually fuck a woman who lactates,” I said before lunging in, my lips finding her nipple to begin sucking heavily. I was soon joined by Konata as she took up the other nipple.

“Ffffffffuck! You… you two -- gah! -- are fucking -- holy shit! -- fucking… weirdos!” Tsunade groaned out, cumming from the overwhelming sensations. Despite her words, she placed a hand on the back of either of our heads and gently stroked our hair.

Once we’d had our fill, Konata moved away as I began to ramp things. Tsunade soon found herself on her stomach more or less, her legs and arms having lost their strength for the time being. I had her hair wrapped once around my fist while pulling her head back and boning her hard fast. All the while, Kona laid next to her, watching those glazed partially lidded eyes with a smirk, whispering small depraved things in her ear.

I could already feel Tsunade losing coherence. She was definitely going to pass out soon and thankfully, I had just enough in me to ride out the rest of it. 

After a bit longer and another series of orgasms from Tsunade, I finally peaked. With a final thrust into the Tsunade, I let out a mighty groan while she screamed out. Thick ropes of semen plastered the inside of her womb, filling her quickly. Konata licked her lips at the sight, reaching down to rub the cum bulge left by my load being emptied into the woman. I gave another thrust as the load began to wane and renewed the flow. When Tsunade couldn't hold anymore, the rest of the cum poured out from around my cock and onto the bed. After a few more moments of that, I was spent, sighing as I pulled free of her, gently laying her to the side.

"Excellent show as always!" Konata said while reaching over and using her fingers to scoop up some of my cum from the bed. After putting it in her mouth, a shiver ran down her spine.

"Yep!" I replied, stretching for a moment before taking a step over. "Alright, you little minx. Your turn."

Konata looked at me with a raised eyebrow before giving me that smug smirk while laying back on the bed. "Alright, go ahead," She said, spreading her legs. "If you can get my pants off."

A deadpan expression came over my face as I stared back at her and she giggled. Yeah, figured she wore them to tease me. But, well, fuck it. I just grabbed the stitchline of the crotch of her pants and tore it wide open, earning a surprised gasp from her. "Why do you gotta be such a tease sometimes?"

"Because it's fun~!" Konata said, giggling as I got positioned over her. She grabbed her ankles and pulled them up next to her head. With one hand on the bed myself, I used the other to get myself aligned before slamming down into her, earning a squeal from her.

I quickly found a pace of quick rapid thrusts into the blunette, ramming deep and hard into her. Unlike most women, I'd long since figured out just what it was that got the biggest and best reaction out of her. I knew exactly what it was that she could take as well.

She wasn't a slouch either. Every time I drove in, she loosened up and as I was pulling out, she tightened nice and good. Her small frame also helped, leading to one tight fuck. Every Thrust into her hit her cervix, earning a small hitched scream from her and her eyes briefly rolling back before she refocused.

"Yes! That feels great!" She moaned out before screaming as an orgasm washed over her body. All I could do is chuckle at the sight of her quaking at the force of it.

Eventually, I noticed out of the corner of my gaze that Tsunade had rolled over and was watching us with a contented smile. As such, I put a bit more of a flare to my movements. I pulled out as far as I could before thrusting back into her. No sense in not putting on a show.

It only took a few thrusts to bring another orgasm of Konata and when she did, she'd let out a rather pleasing scream. Certainly didn't help that she was quite the little dirty talker either.  
"Ahhhhn! Yes, Onii-chan!"  
"Right there! Harder! Harder!"  
"Fuck me faster!"  
"Mmmmppphhfff! Use your onahole!"  
That last one always got a snicker out of me.

Tsunade did have to get up after a bit and get some work done, leaving us to fuck like wild animals. As I neared my orgasm, I was fully standing while thrusting into Konata from behind, my hands wrapped around her wrists and pulling back on her arms. My movements were getting quicker with my building peak drawing out quicker and longer orgasms from my little partner. Every time she came down from own, the next would hit.

Like all good things though, our current coupling came to an end with an explosive climax. Unlike with Tsunade, though, this was less of a single powerful thrust and more of a rapid fire jackhammering. Each piston of my hips dumped a load into Konata, drawing out or adding to whatever climax she was experiencing as well. Like the others, her belly bloated a measure with the volume of seed be deposited with the rest dripping out of her. Tsunade was quick to come back over with a vial, collecting some of the dripping cum before heading back over to her desk to cork it.

After a solid couple of minutes, I was once again finished with that round of cumming.

"Holy shit, you horsedicked bastard," Konata grunted while I dropped her onto the bed. "Jeez, do you always gotta cum buckets?"

"Heh, sorry, Kona," I leaned down and kissed her cheek, earning a smile.

"Hmhmhm, very cute, you two," Tsunade suddenly said while approaching the bed again, having shed her clothing with the exception of her stockings. "I do hope you have more in you, Anon. I enjoyed the show and wish for an encore."

I gave a blink, sighed, rolled my shoulders, and cracked my neck. "Always up for an encore," I replied with a smirk. "Your position."


	3. The Leggings of Zelda

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Guest chapter written by someone in the Discord server I frequent.  
> https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaiWind  
> Dat's dem by the way.

Konata and I's job at WAIFU was rather simple, mostly due to the bots we had set up to handle the calls we got about issues that managed to handle most of the employees' tech incompetence. Emphasis on most, as sometimes there'd be a genuine issue someone was having, and very rarely, one that actually required one of us to head to the caller in person to resolve whatever they needed help with. This time around, the duty fell on Konata; an hour ago she'd gone off to try to fix Zelda's computer, which had apparently locked up with some kind of error message in Sheikah and refused to work even after being turned off and on again. Since no one tends to disturb us in our private IT sanctum anyway, I felt free to only lounge around in a shirt and boxers, and was currently sitting on the couch playing Bloodborne and waiting for my friend to return from her quest.

"Onii-chan! I'm back!"

I was so engrossed in my game at that point I didn't even notice her come back in. "Hey, Kona. It's even weirder when you call me that outside of sex, you know that?"

"Yeah, I know." She closed the door behind her and walked over to our mini fridge, pulling out a can of Monster and downing it in one go.

"How broken was the Zelda thing? It really took you that long?" I asked, still not bothering to look away from the screen.

"Nah, it only took me like 10 minutes to crack. Then we ate each other out," Konata declared proudly.

It was at this point that I looked over to her, and noticed that she'd brought back a trophy from her quest; more specifically, Zelda's tight black leggings. I instinctively paused my game as I stared slack-jawed at her. We'd been friends for quite a long time, but I'd never seen her like this before. The leggings perfectly hugged her ass and thighs, emphasizing all of her curves, punctuated in a perfectly juicy looking cameltoe. I could feel myself getting harder, and it didn't take Kona long to notice.

"See you like the new look," she said, shooting a smug, half-lidded gaze at my crotch, which now resembled a small mountain. She walked over to the couch, making sure to sway her hips seductively with each step, and laid herself across my lap, her ass pushing my cock back down between my legs. "I bet you wanna fuck me in these."

"Yeah, kinda," I said, turning my attention back to the game.

Konata pouted, and wiggled her ass against my cock, causing it to get even harder. "Only 'kinda'? That's not like you, Anon." She sat upright in my lap; I instinctively moved the controller in front of her, so she was now inbetween my arms as I kept playing. She placed her hands on my knees, grinding back against me.

"Okay, a lot. Just let me beat this next boss." I rested my chin on her shoulder, trying to focus on the game and not on the fact that she'd somehow managed to pull my boxers off just enough to get my cock to spring out, now resting perfectly in her crack.

"Tell ya what," she said. "If you can beat the next boss before I make you cum, you can fuck me in any way you want. But if you cum first, then you'll have to clean it off of me with your tongue. Deal?"

"You're on." I bit my lip, half out of focus and half out of horniness. Now it was a challenge of my stamina, and I am nothing without my stamina.

Konata chuckled to herself, and backed her ass up onto me until my dick was between her thighs instead. She clamped down on it hard, rubbing her legs against each other. I didn't have to look at her face to know she was making that classic smug anime girl expression, you know the one I'm talking about. I could feel my cock throbbing in her grip, making me groan under my breath, though nowhere close to cumming quite yet. Eventually, she licked one of her palms and began to rub my tip with it, causing me to briefly close my eyes and nearly die in-game as a result.

"Careful, onii-chan," she said mockingly, but I quickly recovered. If I die and have to reload, it'd just give her more time to make me cum before I even reach the boss, let alone beat it.

It wasn't long before Konata shuffled herself forward a little, letting my cock rest in her thigh gap. Her ass was still pressed against my lap, but now her cameltoe rubbed up against my shaft, letting me feel just how wet she already was, and also making me realize she wasn't wearing any panties under there. I could feel her piercing, stuck between a proverbial rock and a hard place, and as she began to slowly move her lower body up and down along my cock, I was no longer the only one moaning.

"Looks like- ahh, someone's enjoying herself," I teased.

"You don't win if I cum first though," she retorted without missing a beat, and of course she was right.

Unfortunately for me, the years we'd spent boning each other prepared her quite nicely for a game like this, so she knew every move needed to make me lose. She switched up the technique, now rubbing her ass against me in circles, my cock feeling the softness of her thighs and pussy from all sides. Though I was still doing my best to play the game like I was supposed to, with my cock in utter heaven I was slowly losing my grip. Even if I could reach the boss at this rate, I couldn't focus enough to actually win against it. Therefore I had no other option than to pause the game, set the controller aside and grab Konata's hips instead.

"Wow, looks like someone needs to git g-AH!" Konata's sentence was abruptly cut off as I picked her up and slammed her down hard on my cock, the leggings stretching around it and penetrating into her pussy. With one thrust I was balls deep inside her, pressing up against her cervix. It took her a moment before she regained her composure, wiggling her ass once more. "Does this mean I win?"

"Let's call it a draw," I said, lifting her slightly and then thrusting into her again. She continued to bounce on me of her own volition, moaning out each time my cock rammed against her cervix. The stretched fabric of Zelda's leggings gave the whole experience an additional layer of tightness, and I could feel us both inching closer to orgasm with each thrust. The room echoed with the sounds of our moans offset against the wet plapping sound of her ass and thighs coming down on me. As I watched her fat ass bounce against my lap, I grabbed some of her long blue hair and wrapped it around my hand once, then gently pulled her head back.

"Ah! Onii-chan, not so rough!" she screamed out, though we both knew I was being exactly as rough as she liked it. I tugged on her hair again, my other hand sneaking inbetween her legs to play with her clit. Rubbing it through the leggings was quite tricky, especially with the piercing, but with how much wetter she got I was fairly certain I got it right. She continued to grip my knees as she bounced on me, her nails digging into my skin but thankfully not drawing any blood (she kept them short to make fingering herself or the other employees easier).

"Anon, I'm -ah- I'm almost there," she said after a while. I could feel myself about to cum as well, so I grabbed her hips again and thrust into her as hard as I could. Konata's eyes rolled back and she stuck out her tongue, silent as all the air was knocked out of her by my cock and the orgasm that followed. Her thighs pressed together couldn't stop her juices from squirting out through the leggings, leaving a massive wet spot on them and a small puddle on the floor. Her pussy squeezed down hard on me as she came, and I grit my teeth as I reached climax as well. The small bulge on her belly caused by my cock being hilted inside her slowly grew as I shot load after load into her pussy, no doubt pushing the leggings to their absolute limit if not outright tearing them. My hips bucked wildly against hers each time, and I wasn't even done before I heard a faint laugh from Konata, no doubt brought on by a bout of post-nut euphoria.

Once I was finally spent, I collapsed back onto the couch, with Konata resting on my chest. She nuzzled up into me happily, showing that she had no intention of moving off my cock, which was still half-hard inside her, effectively plugging her up.

"Horny fucker," she said lovingly.

"What does that make you then?" I retorted, eliciting a chuckle from her.

We rested like that for a while, not bothering to get up or grab the controller and finish the bossfight. Our blissful rest didn't last long though, as realization slowly dawned on us both at the same time.

"Oh fuck, what are we going to tell Zelda?"


End file.
